The first of my guest posts is by Beth from Twinderlmo, Beth is a married mother of identical twin daughters who blogs about life at a SAHM, home, interiors, Slimming World and more.
During secondary school I went through a phase of being in a huge gang of girls. Literally about 11-12 of us all hanging out and being "total bffs for life" I had so many people to talk to, sit with for lunch, go into town of a weekend with - in essence, it sounds great. Reality? No. Girls are bitchy and teenage ones are even worse.
It was during this period that I found my "friend soulmate". We actually went through our whole school life from 4 years olds at nursery to secondary school together but it was only when we turned 15 that we somehow bonded.
With our wickedly dry, sarcastic and immature humour a true lifelong friendship was born. From spotty 15 year olds thinking we were so cool staying out until 10pm when my Dad would come and pick us up to married Mothers, we have had quite the journey.
I can only ever remember one fall out in what has been half my lifetime of being best friends. I would say nowadays that I have very few true friends and whilst that may sound sad I love it. She has been poorly recently and it has made me realise how close we are and how important friendship is. I love that our children will get to grow up with such a prominent godparent in their life. I never had this as a child really so it's lovely that our kids get so much variety and have such a bond with my best buddy.
As we draw closer to September I can't help but wonder how the girls will get on when they start pre-school and if they will develop really close bonds with one person or be part of a larger group. C at the age of 7, has his best friend but for the best part he floats between groups which is great as he has so many different types of friends and is well accepted into them all.
The teachers always comment how he is everyone's friend which is something I would never have thought when he was smaller as he was scared of his own shadow. He was so incredibly shy and did not like interacting with other children at all. It's a funny thing making friends. Literally strangers trying each other out to see if they gel and want to spend time together. If you're really lucky, you will find a real friend who you don't have to see every week but you have your own little quirks, little language and way of just working.
Being a stay at home parent has left me feeling quite lonely at times, coupled with my husband working away but it's good to have people I can reach out to at all hours of the day whether that be close friends or blogging buddies.
I like to think I am a good judge of character and can suss people out successfully; I'd say I'm pretty right most of the time! As I've gotten older I really have discovered I have no time for toxic friendships. When C was born I desperately wanted baby friends but some were incredibly draining and had we not had babies of a similar age there's no way our paths would ever have crossed and we never would have forged this awkward bond. I can't be bothered to put time and energy into one way relationships and would much rather one friend that five flaky ones.
I am so lucky to have a best best friend who I have known since I was 5. We know more about each other than our husbands do! We may not spent as much time together as we used to but one thing is for sure, we have gone past the buddy stage and really do feel like sisters. And I am so grateful for her wonderful friendship.
Thanks for a fab post Beth! I completely relate to this, I've always had a huge group of friends but am often still lonely, it really is all about finding your true friend soulmate!
Visit Beth's blog to read more posts like this and follow her tongue in cheek parenting stories. You can also find her on Twitter, Facebook & Instagram.